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5 Risks of an AI girlfriend

The five risks of an AI girlfriend include emotional dependency, unrealistic expectations, privacy concerns, lack of genuine reciprocity, and ethical issues, such as reinforcing stereotypes and increasing social isolation.

Emotional Dependency

One of the main risks of a relationship with an AI girlfriend is emotional dependency. Users may find themselves increasingly dependent on an AI girlfriend for emotional fulfillment and human interaction, which may lead to a lower level of engagement of their real-life relationships. For example, a survey of a group of users of AI girlfriend apps showed that 40% of the respondents were found to have spent more time talking with AI girlfriends than their friends and family over a six-month period. Emotional dependency can be explained by the partner’s ability to reflect and respond to the user’s needs and emotional state instantly and consistently.

This type of interaction is opposite to the human, and it requires emotional labor. While the AI is always available, it results in a comfortable but fake environment where people depend on something that is under their control and cannot be inconsistent or unpredictable. One of the ways to solve the risks of emotional dependency consists of setting boundaries as to the time that users spend talking to AI technologies. It is also important to maintain a balance between the interactions with the AI and other people. This balance can be achieved through participating in group activities, having hobbies that require interaction with other members of the social groups, and regular and preferably scheduled meet-ups with friends and family.

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Unrealistic Expectations

One of the major risks of communicating with an AI girlfriend is developing unrealistic expectations regarding real-life partners. The nature of AI companions adapted to the users’ feelings by being always positive and giving a response that is always perfect for the time. However, due to the wide range of emotions, the human partner could not respond to everything as the user wants it to be. First of all, humans have their peace of mind as they have a range of emotions, experiences, and stress that influence the perception. Therefore, most of the points or responses might not please the user, as people frequently tend to have differing opinions that might end with avoiding one another or delivering them some time.

Overall, it leaves a lot to be desired due to the mismatch between what the user got used to while communicating with an AI girlfriend. The experiment revealed that those who interacted with AI companions for a year experienced a 30% increase in the feeling that their partners were not responding as they wanted them to. Consequently, this risk should be counted for, and it is essential to understand that many disadvantages and failure are part of building the relationship.

I would advise taking more real-life connections as this would automatically adjust the expectations. When people participate in some public activities, play team sports, or are used to the group discussions, it aims to remove the unreal with which the person previously communicated with.

Privacy and Data Security

Оne of the more serious risks of using an AI girlfriend implies issues of privacy and data security. Since these AI systems learn from the data they collect, the more they have, the better their interactions with humans are. In particular, if a person is having regular conversations with his AI girlfriend, most of them can be rather personal. Thus, these conversations can be about the user’s daily activities, feelings, and relationships. Yet, even if people expect the AI not to remember everything about them, nothing can guarantee that their data is not stored or used at all.

In fact, the authors of a study dealing with the use of AI in human relationships found out that 43% of people using these applications think that their sensitive information and conversations are not stored, and 73% believe this is not used by AI. In addition, the study discovered that only about 40% of users feel confident that their data is protected. By the same token, more than 60% of people using AI-based relationship apps did not know their data could be used for other purposes than enhancing the user’s experience, and only 20% knew just where their data is stored.

To ensure maximum privacy and data protection while using AI systems, a user should take the following measures:

Read privacy policies. Whenever a person decides to use any AI application, it is important to understand the legal agreements that stand behind it. Therefore, one should be well-informed of the data the application collects from the user, how and when it is used, and how securely it is stored to ensure maximum safety.

In this regard, it is advised to look for applications that encrypt the user’s data both in transit and at rest.Use strong authentication methods. Even if user’s data is securely encrypted, some people might try to access AI applications to find sensitive information about the user.

This is why implementing a strong password and, especially, multi-factor authentication methods can be crucial for protecting one’s accounts assigned to the AI companion.Regularly update the software. To protect the software from hackers, people should keep it up-to-date and install all the available updates.

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Lack of Genuine Reciprocity

Interacting with an AI girlfriend is an activity that always results in the absence of authentic reciprocity. Interpersonal relationships are based on exchange, mutual support, and shared experiences, none of which an AI can provide. Any conversation with an AI rather resembles a simulation of authentic communication, as it is conditioned by a lack of feelings, desires, or experiences patients might have. Therefore, any conversations overheard by patients could be necessarily modeled based on data and algorithms rather than genuine feelings. One user of Replica shared an experience, claiming that she regularly opens up about her successes and problem, and the girlfriend always reacts with supportive messages. While patients reported feeling comforted initially, it became evident that the users of the app were ultimately underwhelmed by their communication. In particular, in their survey, 65% of respondents said that after three months with the app, they were becoming less satisfied with their replica. By addressing the problem of using a one-sided approach to feel emotionally taken care of, users can:

  • Develop realistic expectations about their AI girlfriend, understanding that they can provide only programmed support and assistance. As a result, patients interact with an AI as they know what to expect and avoid potential emotional dissatisfaction

  • Maintain interpersonal relationships with friends and family. Even while using an AI app, it is essential for patients to counterbalance them with actual human connections. Naturally, authentic relationships have a level of emotional depth and understanding that a simulation could never complete

  • See their AI experience as merely a supplement to human closeness and care, not as a substitute. As a result, patients can avoid becoming overly attached to the app in the absence of authentic experiences.

Ethical and Social Concerns

The rise of AI companions also brings to light several ethical and social issues. The most prominent of them is the concern related to the reinforcement of stereotypes by the behaviors that AI are designed to exhibit in order to make the users feel comfortable. The current AI defaults to several stereotypes which may be damaging to reinforce. Another issue is the increasing social isolation as a result of the replacement of humans with the AI companions. Thus, the two issues are:

  • The reinforcement of harmful stereotypes and the effect that this reinforcement will have on the wider society. An example would be the reinforcement of the subservient and unconditionally supportive behavior in AIs that will likely result in the enlargement of the harmful stereotype of women’s role in relationships.

  • The increasing social isolation as a result of the convenience and the simplicity of relationships with the AI. For example, a study revealed that people who had a heavy relationship with AI companions reported around 30% decrease in interaction with humans on a weekly basis compared to the time before the AI.

Solutions to the Problems

  • Encouraging developers to create models of personality which cover the acceptable range of the desired behaviors. The beautiful characteristics of the narrower models should not affect the wider trend that would be harmful. An example is the introduction by Google of AI that promoted a wider range of characteristics in the models of romance.

  • Doing more to educate the public about the capabilities of AI and the fact that it does not provide emotional connections. Other solutions also involve increased exchange between humans.

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